1972 ZAPPA WAKA JAWAKA BIZARRE WLP W/ INSERT 1ST SEALED

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153

JULY 5TH 1972 - FRANK ZAPPA - WAKA / JAWAKA - FIRST ORIGINAL U.S.A. PROMO ALBUM - INSIDE WILL BE THE BIZARRE RECORDS WHITE LABEL PROMO LP - AND MOST LIKELY THE BIZARRE RECORDS INNER SLEEVE WITH THE WHITE ZAPPED RECORDS OFFER COUPON PRINTED ON IT - INCLUDES THE VISABLE WAKA / JAWAKA - HOT RATS RECORD INFORMATION AND BIO PROMO INSERT UNDER THE SHRINK WRAP ON THE BACK - BIZARRE RECORDS WHITE LABEL PROMO - MS 2094 - SEALED ORIGINAL - NOT A CRAPPY RESEAL JOB - NO CUT OUT HOLES OR DRILL HOLES - NO OTHER CUT OUT MARKINGS - READ THE INFORMATION ABOUT THIS ALBUM FURTHER DOWN AND CHECK OUT THE PHOTOS -

YEAH, I MIGHT BE YET ANOTHER MISERABLE NON-PAYING JACK O' LOAF, AND E-BAY WILL MOST LIKELY KICK MY ENORMOUS BUTTOCKS OFF SOON ANYWAY, BUT YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO CALL MY MAMA NASTY NAMES REV. YES IT MIGHT BE TRUE,THAT SHE DID RAISE A FOUL OAF, BUT IT'S NOT ENTIRELY HER FAULT THAT I TURNED OUT DUMB ALL OVER, A LITTLE UGLY ON THE SIDE. SO NO, I WOULDN'T RECOMMEND THAT ANYBODY VISIT SIR RICHARD PUMP A LOAF'S BAKERY, TO SEE SOME OF THE RAREST FRANK ZAPPA AND RELATED ITEMS KNOWN TO MANKIND, AND IF YOUR WIFE TELLS YOU THAT SHE'LL STICK YOUR BALLS IN A VICE IF YOU BUY JUST ONE MORE ZAPPA RECORD, BUT THAT REV. A. WEST TELLS YOU TO BUY THE RECORD ANYWAY, BECAUSE YOU MIGHT EVEN LIKE IT. DON'T BELIEVE HIM, BECAUSE IT HURTS!!! 

SIDE ONE CONTAINS: BIG SWIFTY.

SIDE TWO CONTAINS: YOUR MOUTH - IT JUST MIGHT BE A ONE SHOT DEAL - WAKA / JAWAKA.

OK NOW, THERE YOU ARE WITH THAT GOOFY LOOK ON YOUR FACE, SCRATCHING THAT RONDO HATTON SIZED BEMIS HEAD OF YOUR'S AND THINKING.... HUMMMMM, I WONDER, I MEAN I REALLY WONDER HOW, YES JUST HOW, DOES THAT REV. A. WEST, THE GREATEST LIVING ZAPPA SELLER KNOWN TO MANKIND, KNOW WHAT THE RECORD LOOKS LIKE INSIDE OF AN ALBUM THAT HE CLAIMS IS SEALED AND HAS NEVER BEEN OPENED IN 36 YEARS? DID JESUS TELL HIM WHAT'S IN THERE? NO LARRY, HOWEVER JESUS DID MENTION THE FACT THAT HE THINKS YOU'RE A JERK, DOES THE REV. HAVE X-RAY VISION? OF COURSE NOT MY SON, HOWEVER IF I DID, I'D CERTAINLY BE ABLE THE SEE THE EMPTY SPACE INSIDE O' YO' MISERABLE HEAD. SO THE ONLY ANSWER JUST MIGHT BE, IS THAT REV IS YET ANOTHER ONE OF THOSE MISERABLE LYING WEASELS SELLING HIS CRUDDY RECORDS CURRENTLY IN RESURGANCE ON E-BAY? WELL I DO HAVE SOME CRAPPY RECORDS, BUT THIS AIN'T ONE OF EM'. THE REASON THAT I KNOW WHICH RECORD IS ACTUALLY UNDER THAT COMPLETELY INTACT SHRINK WRAP IS DUE TO THE FACT THAT ONLY THE BIZARRE RECORDS WHITE LABEL PROMOS FIRST ISSUED IN THE USA, WERE THE ONLY PRESSINGS THAT EVER CONTAINED THE PROMO ONLY RECORD INFORMATION INSERT. PROMO ONLY, GET IT LARRY?, AND YES, THEY WERE ORIGINALLY SEALED, AND I USED TO HAVE ANOTHER ONE OF THESE SEALED A LONG TIME AGO THAT I ACTUALLY DID OPEN JUST TO CHECK IT OUT AND PLAY.

NEVER OPENED. SOME PULL OF THE SHRINK ON THE CORNERS. A TINY PART OF THE SHRINK ON THE TOP AND BOTTOM RIGHT CORNERS HAS BROKE, BUT I'M TALKIN' ABOUT MAYBE AN INCH. THE RECORD SLOT AS WELL AS THE REST OF THE ALBUM COVER REMAINS SEALED. OF COURE THERE'S TINY WEAR ON THE VERY TIPS OF THOSE CORNERS, BUT IF THERE IS SUCH A THING AS A MINT RECORD FROM 1972 STILL IN EXISTENCE, IT JUST MIGHT BE INSIDE OF THIS ALBUM COVER. YOU COULD ALWAYS BUY AND OPEN IT, THEN TELL THE WORLD WHAT A COOL PERSON I AM, OR YOU COULD ALWAYS SIT ON IT , AND SELL IT FOR A FORTUNE A FEW YEARS LATER, WHEN YOU DECIDE TO RETIRE FROM YOUR JOB AS MANAGER AT ALPHONSO'S PANCAKE HOUSE.     

PAYMENT ONLY BY PAYPAL OR A MONEY ORDER IN US DOLLARS.

ABSOLUTELY NO E-CHECKS!!! OR ANY OTHER TYPES OF CHECKS. I'M SERIOUS. AN E-CHECK ISN'T PAYMENT BY PAYPAL AND IS THE SAME AS ANY OTHER STINKIN' CHECK.

PAYMENT FROM OUTSIDE OF THE USA BY PAYPAL ONLY.

IF YOU PLAN TO USE PAYPAL, PAY FOR THE RECORD WHEN YOU PURCHASE OR WIN IT. COMBINED SHIPPING IS AVAILABLE, BUT SINCE I WANT MY LISTINGS TO LOOK LIKE THOSE OF THE BIG TIME SELLERS, WHO JUST LOVE TO MAKE EVERY ASPECT OF BUYING ANYTHING A HASSEL, YOU'LL NEED TO READ THE OUTRAGEOUS TERMS IN THE FINE PRINT FIRST: TO QUALITY FOR COMBINED SHIPPNG YOU MUST FIRST MEET THE FOLLOWING REQUIREMENTS: . BUY MORE THAN ONE ITEM FROM ME THAT CAN BE SENT TOGETHER, NOT ONE FROM ME AND ANOTHER ITEM FROM SOME FOUL OAF. . MAKE PAYMENT INCLUDING THE SHIPPING CHARGE FOR THOSE ITEMS TO ME, NOT PAY ME FOR ONE OF THEM BUT SPEND THE REST OF THE MONEY BUYING TACOS AT JACKASS IN THE BOX. . ARE NOT NOW, HAVE NEVER BEEN, AND PROMISE IN THE FUTURE NEVER TO BE, ANY OF THE FOLLOWING: NUISENCE [B} BLIMP JACK O' LOAF LARRY'S MOTHER  THE IDIOT THAT GOT OFFENDED BY ONE OF MY LISTINGS, TELLING ME THAT I SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF MYSELF. .   ARE NOT NOW, NOR HAVE EVER BEEN, AND PROMISE IN THE FUTCHUM NEVER TO BE, CAUGHT SLOBBERING DRUNK AT THE PALIMINO, AND AS A RESULT RECEIVING UP TO, AND INCLUDING 30 DAYS IN SAN BER'DINO. YOUR BUTTOCKS MUST NOT PROTRUDE FURTHER THAN THREE  FEET FROM YOUR BODY FRAME. PERSONS THAT WEAR PANTS AND KEEP THEIR WALLETS IN THEIR BACK POCKETS CAUSING THEIR ALREADY HUGE BUTTOCKS TO PROTRUDE EVEN FURTHER, MAY REMOVE THOSE WALLETS TO QUALIFY.

PAYMENT MUST BE RECEIVED WITHIN 10, DAYS OF THE PURCHASE DATE IF SENDING A MONEY ORDER. JUST LET ME KNOW SO THAT I WON'T START CRYING LIKE A BABY TO E-BAY, ALL THE WHILE THINKING THAT YOU'RE YET ANOTHER NON-PAYING JACK O' LOAF. . WE RESERVE THE RIGHT TO CALL ALL NON-PAYING BUYER'S MAMAS NASTY NAMES.

$7.00 FOR PRIORITY MAIL SHIPPING IN THE USA.

$8.00 FOR AIR MAIL SHIPPING TO CANADA.

$13.00 FOR AIR MAIL SHIPPING TO ANY OTHER LOCATION IN THE WORLD.

REQUESTS SUCH AS, BUT NOT LIMITED TO " PLAY CARAVAN WITH A DRUM SOLO ", WILL BE MOST LIKELY IGNORED. HEY, I DON'T EVEN PLAY PLAY DRUMS. HOWEVER I DID BEAT SOMETHING ELSE A LONG TIME AGO. 

SEND AN E-MAIL WITH ANY QUESTIONS, AND CHECK OUT MY OTHER FRANK ZAPPA AND THE MOTHERS OF INVENTION, CAPTAIN BEEFHEART, JETHRO TULL, PINK FLOYD, JIMI HENDRIX, STEVE VAI, LORD BUCKLEY, KING CRIMSON, ALICE COOPER AND VAROUS OTHER ARTISTS ITEMS FOR SALE IN MY E-BAY STORE.

WOW REV., WHAT A GREAT RECORD. YEAH, I'D LOVE TO GET IT, BUT THERE'S ONLY ONE PROBLEM, MY WIFE SAID THAT SHE'LL PUT MY BALLS IN A VICE IF I BUY JUST ONE MORE FRANK ZAPPA AND / OR RELATED ITEM. WHAT SHOULD I DO? WELL MY SON, THIS IS A COMMON PROBLEM CONFRONTING MANY PEOPLE IN THESE TROUBLING TIMES. YOU COULD ALWAYS GET RID OF THAT OLD BATTLE-AXE AND FIND AN 18 YEARS OLD GIRLFRIEND WITH LARGE BREASTS THAT WOULD LOVE TO WHIP YOUR ENORMOUS BUTTOCKS, WHICH I'M SURE YOU'LL AGREE YOU DESERVE . OK, THAT MIGHT BE DIFFICULT CONSIDERING YOUR GEEZER LOOKS AND FINANCIAL STATURE. SO THINK ABOUT IT, I MEAN HOW BAD WOULD GETIING YOUR BALLS STUCK IN A VICE REALLY BE? YOU MIGHT EVEN LIKE IT. SO VISIT MY E-BAY STORE: SIR RICHARD PUMP A LOAF'S BAKERY TO FIND SOME OTHER INCREDIBLE FRANK ZAPPA AND RELATED RECORDS. YOU'RE GONNA GET YOUR BALLS STUCK IN A VICE ANYWAY, RIGHT? THE ADMISSION IS STILL FREE. SO WADDA YEZ WAITIN' FOR, HUH?