ALLAN SHERMAN-Music To Dispense With PROMOTIONAL ONLY 1966 LP Coca Cola ads NM-

$

46

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ALLAN SHERMAN  - "Music to Dispense With" in mono on Scott Paper SP12. One sided album with 6 parodies, Sherman was commissioned by the Scott Paper Company (Container Division) to write 6 songs - (Makin' Whoopee/Makin' Coffee; Vending Machines; There are Cups; There'll Be Some Changes Made/That's How the Change is Made; The Wonderful Tree in the Forest; and Scott Cups). Released in extremely limited supply, Sherman, one of the main influences on Weird Al and a Dr. Demento favorite, didn't necessarily make Scott Paper very happy - as at least one of his songs was 'environmentally conscious'. Very few of these made it out of the corporation. Photos of Coca Cola cups on the back of the cover (see photos). Only two reported sales on eBay, one for $50 and the other for $200.

The environmental parody 'The Wonderful Tree is the Forest' - is a real slap on the face to paper and lumber companies and it's just amazing how it made it onto vinyl. Possibly someone from Scott Paper caught the drift of the song, full of sarcasm, and pulled all the albums that remained. (I have no idea how they were distributed but they were not sold in stores). 'The Wonderful Tree...." is about a centuries old sequoia that is 640 feet tall but is chopped and cut from the top down (taking with it birds' nests, etc.) until it is completely felled and hauled to a paper processing plant - first becoming wood chips and then pulp to make Scott cups. It also mentions a dog that has nowhere to pee.  Not to worry, Scott will plant a seed in the same place and 100 years from now there will be a replica and the dog will have a spot to pee again. I can't imagine the executives from Scott would have appreciated this song - if they took the time to listen to the words or think about its pro-ecology message.

Here's a bit from 'noisesfortheleg' blogspot:

The Scott Paper Company commissioned Sherman to write six songs for them. They were handed a masterpiece of parodic songs concerning the effects of reforestation, technology, and economics on man and dog.

Did Scott flinch when Sherman declared their products made holy water 'somewhat holier' or made chicken soup taste 'twice as Jewish?' And when was the last time a corporation risked being directly responsible for religious humor?

So, it won't be easy to find yourself another copy of this one-sided gem.  This album should also be of interest to collectors of Coca Cola memorabilia (of which I've been informed that there are a few more Coke collectors than Scott Paper products collectors) because two vintage Coca Cola cups are pictured on the back cover. Enlarge the photo and see for yourself.

Record Grade: Strong VG++, a 7.5; actually the play side is a Near Mint Minus to Near Mint except for the very beginning where there is a short scratch that you can feel and that causes clicks or pops for about 7-8 seconds into the first track (strangely the blank side does have a few scuffs)

Cover Grade: Near Mint Minus

Labels:  Yellow, custom, see photo

All records are carefully graded. In an attempt to give customers an accurate impression of condition rather than adhere to somewhat arbitrary criteria, I give an "overall presentation" grade, supplemented when necessary with additional remarks. Please refer to my grading system below for a more detailed explanation.

MY GRADING SYSTEMS: I’ve been told that I grade conservatively. My NM (near mint) is my highest grade for opened records (which would also include unplayed records). It’s a 9 or 10 on a 1-10 scale. M- would be equivalent to an 8; VG++ to a 7; VG+ to a 6; VG to a 5; VG- to a 4; G to a 3; F to a 2 and P to a 1. The same scale applies when I grade covers (jackets). Significant defects are specifically noted and taken into consideration in the grade.

GRADING DESCRIPTIONS

• GRADING is based on the following criteria
• Sealed = store stock new
• Near Mint = like new or near new with only one or two small insignificant defects, a 9 or better on a 1-10 scale
• Near Mint Minus (or NM-) = very nice. Would be Near Mint, except for a couple of light hairlines or scuffs, which do not affect play
• VG++ = still a very nice record with all or nearly all of its original gloss but may have a few more light, surface marks, hairlines, needle tracks or the like which should not materially effect play
• VG+ = a nice, but used record that may have a series of light scuffs or scratches. It probably plays with a few pops, but has no serious problems.
• VG = a well-used record that still should sound OK when played, but may have moderate surface noise, pops, etc.
• VG- = a well-worn record that plays through without skipping, but will do until a better copy comes along.
• Good = not actually good at all but probably will play through but with much in the way of surface noise, pops, crackles, etc. Still, will have no cracks, chips or the like
• Fair = you’re getting this record just to own but not to play
• Poor = the sky’s the limit, generally I will discard a record this bad (and sell the cover, jacket or sleeve alone) unless the label holds some particular interest

  VISUAL GRADING: All records are visually graded only unless I state that they are play-graded. Some major labels were pressed on better quality vinyl and will sound better than a record which visually appears the same on "budget" labels which were pressed on lower quality vinyl. Recording techniques also varied. The sound on live albums may be far inferior to studio recordings. There may also be defects in the pressing which are invisible. The point is that an album on a high quality label that was visually graded VG+ may sound better than an album on a budget label that was visually graded Mint- or even Near Mint. Please refer to my return policy, below. But please don’t be shocked if a record visually graded Near Mint doesn’t sound state of the art. If I base my grade on a PLAY GRADE, I will state this specifically in my grading section.

  COVERS: There are really too many possible defects regarding covers to be as specific in my definitions as I had been with my record grades. But please keep in mind these general grading guidelines:

  • I will give greater weight to the condition of the front cover than back cover when assigning an overall grade
  • No cover with a cut out hole or saw mark will be graded Near Mint even if it is still in factory shrink and there is no other wear
  • I will not reduce the grade of a cover for stickers which are glued to the jacket by the record company (eg. Contains the hit song Expressway to Your Heart); but will reduce the grade for stickers glued on the cover by stores, previous owners, etc.
  • If I write that a cover has a bb hole, I’m talking about a small cut out hole
  • A saw mark is a narrow cut in the perimeter of the cover, could be anywhere and vary in length from 1/2” to 2” at the most.
  • The overall grade takes into consideration any stated defects. For example, if I grade a cover VG+ and then state it has 6” top and bottom seam splits - I’ve already reduced the grade because of the seam splits. If the seams weren’t split, the cover would be graded higher such as VG++ or Mint-.

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    The winning bidder pays for shipping.

    DOMESTIC SHIPPING WITHIN THE UNITED STATES: Due to increase in postage rates, I have sometimes been losing money on shipping as I send all records in sturdy professional Bags Unlimited mailers with one or more fillers. Therefore, I am now using the eBay postage calculator to determine postage. This will also result in a more equitable charge for priority mail shipments. Instead of a flat fee, those who live in the southeast and mid-east will reap the benefit of reduced priority mail rates.

    DOMESTIC AND INTERNATIONAL SHIPMENTS: COMBINED SHIPPING - Save money when I mail 2 or more records in the same package. Please wait until I send you an invoice or request an invoice when combining two or more records or cd's in one shipment -prior to making payment.

    INTERNATIONAL SHIPMENTS: Overseas customers are invited to bid. As with U.S. shipments, I will use eBay's postage calculator for all overseas shipments. Postage to Canada is substantially less than to other countries - if you live in Canada and don't see a separate rate for Canada , please e-mail me and I'll modify the invoice to reflect the lower shipping charges. Surface mail is no longer available for overseas. Express Mail International and Priority Mail International are available - rates are substantially higher than first class international and will be quoted for each purchase if buyer requests this service. Express Mail International or Registered mail is now required for purchases over $100. Generally, Express International costs $35 for 1 album and additional albums are about $5-6 more. Registered costs about $26 for 1 album, about $5 more for each additional album. Registered mail may not be available to certain countries. I am sorry but the increased risks and costs must be passed on to the international buyer. On the bright side of things, Express Mail International will get you the package faster and it is safer. Registered mail is the safest form of shipment (but not as fast as express mail international). So there are benefits to the buyer as well as the seller. Please wait until I send you an invoice or request an invoice when combining two or more records or cd's in one shipment -prior to making payment.

    Please check out my other eBay auctions and stores listings.

    I’ve been listing all types of records - mostly LP’s - including 50’s and 60’s rock ‘n’ roll, country, folk jazz, blues, personalities, new wave and punk, surf, psych, spoken word, comedy, etc., etc....... I try to list unusual, unique or obscure records, not the ones that you see all the time. While a majority of my listings are albums, you’ll often find a nice selection of 45’s, EP’s or picture sleeves...and an occasional 78 or two.

    My return policy: . You may return an item if it's not in the condition described. You may not return items if you decide you don't like the music. I will return the base price of the item unless I make an error in shipment such as sending you the wrong record or cd. In that case, you will be reimbursed for the cost of the item and shipping both ways. In addition, the item must be returned in its original condition , i.e. the way it was shipped when it left my hands. While a very high percentage of my records arrive safe and sound (I use professional mailers and a filler or two, more for 78’s), they occasionally are damaged in transit. If that happens, I won’t accept the return of the record or other item.

    Sealed Records: After a sealed record is paid for, I will gladly open it before mailing to make sure that the record is new & unplayed. If the record is not, I will give a full refund. Even though it is easy to spot most resealed records from the 50's and 60's [I will mention that in the desription if it looks like a possibility], not all records from the 70's & 80's are quite as obvious. Please ask for any details about the seal of a particular record & I will be happy to answer.